It's been 2 years since I last saw you. You didn't change a lot. You still look the same and sound the same. I didn't change a lot. I still feel the same and want the same. I was nervous. I couldn't look straight into your eyes when I've got the chance, afraid that you will be able to read me like an open book as you always. And now that I don't have a chance again, I regret it and I hate myself. It's been 5 years. 5 years since I know you. 5 years since the day you took away all the air in my lungs and set my world on fire. 5 years since you taught me a foreign yet intense emotion - love.
I fell in love with your indifference. I fell in love with your aura. I fell in love with your everything. You read me like an open book and it ignite something deep inside of me. You are my inspiration, my strength. I want to be strong, determined and confident like you.
You never fail to surprise me and set my heart fluttering. It was a small incident, but the fact that you could recognize me at the other end of the traffic lights up a dead emotion in me called excitement, with its claws tight around me. I've never felt this relaxed, this calm, these much of inner peace for a long time since everything started crumbling down. But just being beside you, having you by my side, granted the opportunity to burst out laughing together with you makes every single problems forgotten at that moment.
Thank you for staying in contact with me. Thank you for remembering me. Thank you, for not forgetting the promise that you made.
I've never love anyone like this and I don't think I can ever love again in the same way. So please, look at me and tell me you feel something for me.
I tried to bury these emotions. I tried to kill my heart. But I lose it everytime you come around. It's okay if we can't stay together forever. But please give me a chance to have something called a history with you. Yes I'm desperate for your love and this is just another unrequited story that might last forever. I'll never forget about you though. For my heart will never allow you gone.
I thought of those childhood days when we played and dreamed. You told me you'll take me along by your side if you ever rule the world, though not as a bride but an entertainer. Oh, but surely you know, I'll be oblige to stay at your side without a care of the price. You told me with such sincerity and surety that you'll never forget me. And thank you, a lot, that you didn't, even if we hadn't been in contact for so long.
I thought those days when we were so close. You shared all your secrets and aspirations while I listened and strived to follow your footprints. Time might have washed away parts of the memory, but no, I won't forget about the joy you brought to me. So please, baby, come back to me. I don't know how to make you talk now. I don't know how to get you interested. And most of all, I don't know how to get back into your life and mean something. I want to be together with you again. Even if I am just a friend.
I don't know how it is possible, that you mde my unfeeling heart tainted with hatred feel at ease once again. You must be my remedy, destined to be my sanity. So baby, please, stay with me.
You used to give in to my whines, after putting up a long fight. You'll leave me under the charm of your cheeky smile right after giving me what I wanted, before you return home. I'm left dumbfounded, staring at the space you stood before you're gone. Please pamper me again as you did in the past.
It's been 5 years. 5 years since I felt this way towards you. I know it's not going to fade away so I just want you to stay. Don't leave. Come back to me.
Completed: 03.09.16
